i need the smell of summer, i need its noises in my ear.
it's been exhausting, this semester. busy every moment, but listen to this: there is something truly amazing happening. this making music thing seems to be working out quite well. and who could have imagined having only been a band for a few months, barely it seems, and things happening already? i won't lie. i've been holding back a bit, just in case, but here, i can say it. i am more excited than i have ever been in my entire life. it's making the music and hearing it slowly turn into beautiful noise. mickey drew up the contract the other day and everything seems alright. (don't think twice, it's alright). I shouldn't have to think twice about this. I am trembling with the thought of driving all day in the summer heat, playing a show in some shitty town, or some magnificent town, or any town at all, hearing the lyrics repeated by a throbbing group of strangers, one big heart ready to burst at any moment, living for my keyboard and my brothers and the smell of hot pavement and beaches and tattoos and when it is all over it will be like this gigantic story that i can tell forever and ever and it will make me proud. it's hard to see the bright side of things in the midst of lots of negativity, but my God, it's there. i will be off to bed now, dreaming of the piercing riffs of guitar solos and the lovely notes of a black and white piano.